Yesterday I had a bad dream, I told my friend,
worst dream ever, dreamed I went to hell.
"Well I'm a bad person, I'm afraid I might have to go there some day. Tell me, how bad was it?"
me: Well, everybody had really long chopsticks and nobody could eat because of it.
friend: That sounds horrible, I'll try to be a better person.
Today, I had another dream, so I woke up and told my friend about it.
I had the most wonderful dream ever, I want to heaven!
Friend: I might like to go there some day, tell me how good is it?
Well the chopsticks are very long and you can not eat, but you can feed other people, and they can feed YOU.
(Now at this point of the joke, you need to pick up some chop sticks, and a piece of food from on top of the table ((-Gross!)) and say, "Who wants to go to heaven?!"
Offer it to someone.
When they act disgusted because the food was on the table, say, "FUCK YOU, Go to hell!"